Happy Friday Again! its February 24th and I am about to start my happy weeekend in a bit. so I am taking the opportunity to talk about something I have been thinking over last few weeks. If you are familiar with your experience, Option paralysis is a real phenomenon in the online dating world. In simple words, Option paralysis is the feeling of being overwhelmed by too many choices. So, it occurs when someone has too many options to choose from and ends up not choosing any of them.
If you are reading my blogs time to time. you would be aware that I have been taken and untaken a few times over last 2 decades. I have been using popular dating apps on and off. and if you have tried it too, you would surely know: It’s easy to fall into the trap of option paralysis when you’re on online dating. There are so many potential matches out there, and it can be overwhelming trying to figure out who is right for you.
Now to break down few things: the Term ‘Option Paralysis’ was first discussed by psychologist Barry Schwartz in his 2004 book, “The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less.” I have had no time to read the book throughly but I would love to claim it was something nice to read, learn and think about. (specially that I have all the time in the world now!)
so to briefly discuss – the more choices we have, the harder it is to make a decision, and often we end up feeling unsatisfied with our choice regardless. Which I am sure you felt while using a dating app. With so many dating apps and sites to choose from, it’s easy to get caught up in an endless cycle of swiping and scrolling without ever making a real connection. And even when you do match with someone, there’s no guarantee that things will go anywhere, given the number of potential options that are just a message away. People who are presented with too many choices are more likely to experience negative feelings, such as being overwhelmed.1So, if you feel down about your dating prospects, it could be due to an overload of choices.
The good news is once you become aware of this phenomenon, it’s relatively easy to break out of the cycle by narrowing your focus and committing to a specific person or app. based on my understanding, In theory, this should be a good thing, as it gives people more opportunities to find a partner with whom they are compatible. However, research suggests that too much choice might actually be a bad thing when it comes to online dating. One of the reasons why online dating can be so difficult is that there are just too many options to choose from. A 2011 study published in Biology Letters found that people who were presented with many potential partners were less likely to make any decisions at all.2
In fact, the participants in the study became so overwhelmed by the sheer number of choices that they found it difficult even to narrow down their options. Now I now, Option paralysis can be frustrating and overwhelming, but it’s important to remember that it’s normal to feel this way when presented with too many choices.
Option paralysis can manifest itself in several ways in the online dating world. Here are some examples based on my own first hand experience:
1. You spend hours scrolling through dating apps without ever connecting with anyone.
2. You match with someone on a dating app but don’t message them because you’re not sure they are the right person for you.
3. You go on first dates with multiple people but never follow up with any of them because you can’t decide who you want to pursue.
4. You keep your dating options open and never commit to one person because you’re afraid of missing out on someone better.
Now, If any of these sound familiar, you may suffer from option paralysis in your dating life. Congrats (LOL!)
Now good news is, after some digging and busting my sleep I was able to come up with possible solution on How to Overcome Option Paralysis in Online Dating. And continue to read, If you find yourself experiencing choice paralysis in your online dating life, there are some things you can do to overcome it.
Firstly, it’s important to practice mindfulness and be fully engaged and present with the person you are with. In fact, you may not be a match, but if you aren’t able to fully invest in the person you are spending time with, you aren’t giving them a fair shot.
And then, I would suggest : try to be more selective in who you message and respond to. Don’t feel like you have to message everyone who catches your eye. Instead, focus on a few people who you really want to get to know better.
Second, give yourself a time limit for online dating. Set aside a specific amount of time each day to scroll through profiles and message people. Once your time is up, log off and take a break. This will help you avoid getting lost in the online dating world and will make it easier to focus on your interactions with potential matches.
Finally, remember that online dating is just one way to meet people. There are plenty of other ways to find someone special in your life. Don’t put all your energy into dating apps, and be open to meeting people in person as well as online. If you find that you’re struggling with option paralysis in your online dating life, remember that you’re not alone. It’s a common problem that can be overcome with a little effort and mindfulness. Try to be more selective in who you talk to, set aside a specific amount of time for online dating each day, and don’t forget that there are other ways to meet people as well. With a little effort, you can break out of the cycle of option paralysis and succeed in online dating.
I wont prolong this writing for now. I need to get busy with my weekend chores. Thanks for reading & Good luck to you all.
Safin